‘Shrek’ Quotes

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“That’s right, fool! Now I’m a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha!” – Donkey

“And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases seepin’ outta my butt that day!” -Donkey

“Whoa. Look at that. Who’d wanna live in a place like that?” – Donkey
“That would be my home.” – Shrek
“Oh and it is LOVELY. You know, you’re really quite a decorator. It’s amazing what you’ve done with such a modest budget. I like that boulder. That is a NICE boulder.” – Donkey

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“WHY are you following me?” – Shrek
“Oh, I’ll tell you why.
[starts to sing] ‘Cause I’m all alone, There’s no one here beside me, My problems have all gone, There’s no one to deride me! But ya gotta have friends…” – Donkey
“STOP SINGING! Well, it’s no wonder you don’t have any friends!” – Shrek
“Wow! Only a TRUE friend would be that truly honest!” – Donkey

Donkey: …Can I stay with you?
Shrek: What?
Donkey: Can I stay with you? Please?
Shrek: Of course!
Donkey: Really?
Shrek: NO!

“We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I’m making waffles!” – Donkey

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Gingerbread Man: NO! Not the buttons! Not my gumdrop buttons!
Lord Farquaad: All right, then! Who’s hiding them?
Gingerbread Man: Okay, I’ll tell you… Do you know… the Muffin Man?
Lord Farquaad: The Muffin Man?
Gingerbread Man: The Muffin Man.
Lord Farquaad: Yes, I know the Muffin Man. W-who lives down on Drury Lane?
Gingerbread Man: Well, she’s married to the Muffin Man…
Lord Farquaad: The Muffin Man?
Gingerbread Man: THE MUFFIN MAN!
Lord Farquaad: She’s married to the Muffin Man…

Shrek: [observing a giant building] That must be Lord Farquaad’s castle… Do you think he’s maybe compensating for something?

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